Blue Like Jazz

To be completely honest, when I realized that we had to read another book, I was a little upset. However, Blue Like Jazz has drawn me in completely. I love the book so far. The way the author writes is a new style to because it seems as if he is right in front of you. Like I am having general conversation with him and I have been knowing him for years. His style of writing is very conversational! I really enjoy that. So far, compared to the other writings, this is my favorite.

Something that stood out to me in his writings was the way he explained the way he lied as a kid. I never truly payed attention to that, but I think that we all have lied that way...some still do:). I never really thought about our little white lies that in depth. Miller really makes me notice little things about myself and humans as a whole. I am genuinely looking forward to reading the rest of this book.

Project Update

Since my lats project update, I feel like I have made a lot of progress. My last project update was mostly ideas and a general outline of what I wanted to execute. However, now I have put my words to work. I have interviewed a lady at the YWCA over the domestic violence program. The interview provided me with great footage and a better understanding. I have not been able to interview the family member that endured domestic violence due to conflicting schedules. However, I plan to do that over Easter break. I have also been able to research general information on the topic.

As far as an idea or set display of how I am going to present my project has came to a standstill. At first, I wanted to make a video but, considering the fact that I don't have much time I have to think quick. I think I am going to settle with a speech with a visual display..like a video of my family member.

LIVING BY THE STRUGGLE...WILL THERE BE BETTER DAYS??

Living by the struggle is something that is always associated with Christians. We endure so much and stay so faithful towards God...why hasn't he made a way?? It took a long time for me to understand and grasp this, however something truly clicked for me when I read the required readings for Neumark. The story of Amanda made the statement plain and clear. I am one that can relate to Amanda's story in some way. Amanda was a female that lived and breathed poverty. It seemed as if every time she was picked up or restored she was knocked on her feet. Her welfare checks kept being stolen from her. If it wasn't from a stranger it was from a family member. I am one that can relate to this story. Amanda reminds me of my mother. My mother is a very strong willed individual but had to live by poverty. My family struggled throughout life and did everything she could to make ends meet. Like Amanda, our family was on welfare. And like Amanda, it seemed like every time she got back on her feet she was knocked down again. Like Amanda, there were those situations that my mother felt like there was no way out! However, with all faith in God, nothing was put on her that she could not bare. I see this in Amanda and it makes me understand that struggles are a test. A test that is either pass or fail. So many times Christians tend to only praise God when things are going your way or he finally brings you through a problem. But, its amazing to see the things that he will do if we continue to put faith in him no matter what! Living by the struggle is our exam of life...to see who is worthy of living eternal life in the kingdom of heaven!!

My Breathing Space

Neumark has truly captured my undivided attention every time I read a passage from the book. I find myself becoming more and more indulged in the reading. Something that grabs my attention every single time is the personal accounts. The true stories about the struggles that each individual that crosses her path goes through makes this book more personable. Honestly, her teachings and the way she cares for others reminds me of my deceased pastor. He was thee sweetest individual and never looked down on another. Both of them have something truly inspirational in common. With every person that they come in contact with, they learn something new. Both of them may have learned a life lesson or a eye opener about the atmosphere that surrounds them. However, each time they learn something new! I long to be that way! God places individuals in your life for a bigger purpose. I never truly understood that until I began to read this book. Also, you learn something great through others struggles!! WOW! that's a really powerful concept because I never really paid attention to it! Neumark doesn't seem like a common person to me! She reveals herself as a unique individual. I find it intriguing how she reveals the real life struggles that we face everyday. Through her writings, I realize that injustice surrounds our every move. It surrounds every aspect of our lives. We may find injustice within ourselves or within others. Its hard to accept that injustice has become apart of everyday life, but Neumark makes that evident. Her stories remind me of this after school program where my mother works. When I go to visit, all I encounter is injustice. The children are mostly African American and all display a form of injustice that has either been taught or observed by them. Its hard to shallow a real dose of reality! The fact is that the cycle of injustice is starting with the young! Neumark's stories of the struggles that the young children in the South Bronx battle with are real! I don't know...I feel as if her book is becoming one of my favorites and a true eye opener. I really look forward to finishing this book and learning something new about myself and my surroundings.

Desire for CHANGE

As I completed the readings for Friday, some pieces that I read in King's writings remained in my thoughts! Even as I moved on to Heschel.

"We were taking the black young men who had been crippled by our society and sending them eight thousand miles away to guarantee liberties in Southeast Asia which they had not found in southwest Georgia and east Harlem. And so we have been repeatedly faced with the cruel irony of watching Negro and white boys on TV screens as they kill and die together for a nation that has been unable to seat them together in the same schools. We watch them in brutal solidarity burning the huts of a poor village, but we realize that they would never live on the same block in Detroit. I could not be silent in the face of such cruel manipulation of the poor."

Will we continue to be silent!!!??? This quote truly reminds me of the tribulation the United States is facing today. A pointless war as many would say. As I read this it open my eyes to see how silent and accepting our country has been. So many young men and women are suffering from the repercussions of pledging "honor" to their wonderful country by fighting in Iraq. This quote truly hit home for me. I currently have a cousin that is fighting in the war. His family is stationed in Texas and he is in Iraq. He joined the army with intention of being able to gain all expense paid higher learning, since his parents would never have the opportunity to pay for his college education. He never knew that his intentions and dreams would be shattered into fighting in an unjust war with no meaning. I haven't seen my cousin since I was in the 10th grade due to this war. I have heard many stories from his mother about the brutality and horrid sights he has experienced and seen. We terribly miss him. But all we can do is wait.....wait for him to return because he is fighting for our land of opportunities.

It is funny how history continues to repeat itself. It seems apparent to me that the war in Iraq is a close relative of the Vietnam War. They both resemble and have striking features and characteristics. WHEN WILL WE STAND AGAINST IT!! Our countries motives are so backstabbing to their own citizens. Injustice lives all around us! It breathes in us and is apart of our everyday lives. King states in this account that justice is indivisible. So true! But for it to be able to withstand division we must band together and fight it! I challenge myself and all others to do something different. To stand up for something that you believe is completely wrong and unethical!! It can be a huge or small action but I desire change! We all desire change.

FINAL PROJECT UPDATE...

After receiving comments from Dr. Holt and Dr. LaLonde, I have decided to take their direction for my project. I am still focusing on the issue of domestic violence; however my approach is going to be a little more direct. The issue of domestic violence hits home for me. It has affected myself and loved ones. At first, I wanted to avoid the personal connection, but now I am going to use it as my main theme. I feel that my personal connection will dictate and shape the project. I am going to conduct my project as more of an informational video or PowerPoint. I want to provide details and helping information about domestic violence but also examine how and is justice being served. I am going to interview the individual in my family that endured the violence and families members that it affected. To back up the issue and provide educational information from an organization, I plan to interview and visit the YWCA. They are widely known and I feel that this will make the issue more relatable and draw my audience in. If time permits, I plan to visit other organizations that provide guidance and care for victims.
Honestly, the steps that I have taken towards achieving my desired final product have been minimal. The only steps I have begun are brainstorm and decide on a concrete game plan for the project. It is a little upsetting to know that I have not started putting in the time needed for this project. However, now that I know the exact direction that I am going towards it will be easier to beginning.
The only challenges that I am facing is organization. I want to achieve so much and I feel like I need to set a solid outline for my project. It’s tough because there is so much information out there that needs to be stated, however I don’t think that time will permit me to state every detail. I know for sure that I will need you guy’s guidance and insight on what I need to do next. Also, in some way I want to tie in my fellow classmates or Belmont in some way. How do I go about doing that? My ideas were maybe a survey or poll about what they know about domestic violence, do they know anyone that went or is going through it, and was or is justice being served?

To Do List:
Meeting with Dr. LaLonde and Dr. Holt
Construct a general outline for presentation and paper
Contact the YWCA before this week ends
Contact the individuals I plan to interview----personal connection
Belmont Connection?????
Research general information on domestic violence, as far as what it is etc.
Begin interviewing
Start constructing the display for the presentation
Start constructing paper
Continue working on project
Eventually put in the final touches
Proof Project
Submit
** I WANT TO BE DONE WITH MY PROJECT BEFORE APRIL 20th**

Cashing the CHECK that came back as INSUFFICIENT FUNDS!

"America has given the Negro people a bad check; a check which has come back marked 'insufficient funds'. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. And so we've come to cash this check, a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice."

The "I Have A Dream" speech has always been identified as that ice breaking moment for African American history. We commonly hear that King's dream is being achieved through barriers that Obama has broken! But has the check been cashed? Are we finally viewed as equals amongst the majority!? Has our insufficient funds been reversed to sufficient funds? Can we say that the division of white and black opportunity diminished? Can we stand by our biological equal and receive the same kindness and respect??? Has there been a change?

Through the eyes of a young African American female, the moment has not occurred! We continue to break barriers and prove our equality instead of inferiority to the majority! BUT the thoughts, snickers, and reality of the division has not changed! Has justice been served? I can say it partially has because on pen and paper everything seems equal! We are repeatedly told that we are all equivalent! That we all have the same opportunity and chance! But as I observe the world around me, the disgusting truth still lives on! It breaks my heart to acknowledge reality! It hurts to see that the world has not changed! It may be concealed and kept in private but the generational cycle continues to spin on!!!!

I read this speech with a sense of realization about my surroundings but optimism about my future! This speech provides me with strength and a means to push forward. So many incidents around me concerning my fellow brothers and sisters not recognizing where we have came from! But I take this speech as a challenge! As a test to receive and accept my difference but embrace it! To live up to what I want to be and fight for what is right! To look for injustice and correct it! To be the pure definition of justice!!! I read this speech with the mindset of receiving the check and cashing it! Not only for myself, but for the world to see that like King, I have a dream! A dream that may seem blurry now but obtainable!